3 posts tagged “romance”

like ham and eggs. The chicken is involved, but the pig is committed." Martina Navratilova.

I'm a little bit of a commitment-phobe. Okay, maybe more than a little bit. Thats probably the main reason why i haven't gotten a tattoo yet.

I've been with my share of losers, but maybe part of it is my fault. Maybe i pick losers because i don't want to commit to anyone worthwhile.

New year, new me. So i'm going to make myself more open. I'm going to put myself out there. I'm going to lay some eggs in the meantime, but maybe i'll meet someone. 

If I don't, I know I'm perfectly capable of bringing home the bacon and frying it up in a pan. 

que bueno por conocer

The best translation for this phrase would be something like "better the devil you know:

As many of my friends know, I've been considering getting back together with my ex-boyfriend. He's mildly unstable, has a mild mental illness, and is showing some warning signs of alcoholism.

I wouldn't go so far as to say I love him, but I do care about him. He's thoughtful, sweet, but more importantly I know what to expect. I'm a little weary of starting from scratch. My track record isn't spectacular. 

I am a magnet for guys that are bad for me. Or maybe guys that are bad for me are for me. I'm not sure who attracts what, but I don't want to jump into the unknown because by the time I figure out he has a second family/ has a drug problem/ is an illegal immigrant/ worships the devil/ is the a wanted felon, I'm too emotionally invested to let go.

With the ex, I'm aware of most of his problems. He frequently tells me that he loves me and misses me. He makes me feel appreciated. There's no fireworks or birds singing when we kiss, but I'm also not in fear for my life.

We worked through some problems in the past and if he goes back to his lying, cheating, cold, dead-beating, two-timing, double dealing, mean, mistreating ways, I'm gone and this would be the last time we break up.

I said that the last time we broke up, but this time I mean it.

So I'm here at work with the guys. T is practicing his guitar and I suggested that he learn to play 50 ways to leave your lover. It's one of my favorite songs and I consider it the best break up tutorial. That brought us to the subject of this post. We really want to know how may ways we can come up with to leave a lover. Lets start with what the song says:

1) Just slip out the back, Jack

2) Find a new plan, Stan

3) No need to be coy, Roy, just get yourself free

4) Hop on the bus, Gus

5) Just drop off the key, Lee

Now the ways that we've come up with

6) Make a quick call, Paul

7) Don't say good bye, Guy

Okay so now we ran out of things that rhyme. So we have decided to come up with enough break up lines to reach the 50 we're going for.

8) It's not you its me... I can't stand you

9) I am married to the sea.

10) Why don't we just take a break?

11) The only way to appreciate eachother is to see other people.

12) Really, it's not you, I'm just going through a selfish phase.

13) Maybe we have too much in common, we're too much alike.

14) Life is too short to make a mistake.

15) Yes, I love you but I really really hate you too.

16) You mean more to me than life itself, but I'm suicidal

17) I wish I had just stayed your friend.

18) I can't see myself with you when i'm 80.

19) I'm sorry, I just can't. Please don't hate me.

20) I miss being happy.

21) You simply can't make the heart feel something it wont, and mine won't. I'm sorry.

22)It's not me it's you.

23) Sorry, I was drunk...For about the last 6 months.

24) I just need some space.

25) I want to know what it's like to be alone.

26) I just need some time to figure out what I want/ who I am.

27) I don't want to be with you.

28) If you were about to say that you just wanted fun and no labels, I'd want to continue. But I think you want more.

29) You just know me too well and that freaks me out

30) Get dressed quickly or you're leaving in your pajamas

31) We're different religions. It will never work

32) We don't make eachother happy, is that what you want to hear?

33) I really like you, you're a great person and we have great fun  - you're just not a long-term prospect.

34) Sorry, you're not the one.

35) The sex is great, but i just dont love you.

36) I love my mother more than I love you.

37) I want to be able to see other people without hurting you.

38) Have you always been so boring?

39) I need a lover who understands that 20 hours a day on the Internet is normal.

40) If the phone doesnt ring, it's probably me

41) We've just grown apart

42) The timing is bad.

43) I'm scared of your friends

44) I really did mean it when i said i'll love you forever. I just think we'll get along better if we end up with other people.

45) I'm just tired of spending so much money on a relationship I know won't last.

46)  Being with you has helped me realize that I am gay

47) I'm over it

48) I just can't give you the attention you deserve

49) I'm in a place where I really need to focus on my career.

And of course, the words that everyone in a relationship dreads to hear

50) We need to talk...

 I'm sure there are more than 50 ways to leave your lover, but we started running out of ideas.